5 Ways to Support Your Kiddo In Therapy

If this is a new experience for you, here are a few helpful tips to support your child in therapy.

1. Talk Before Your First Visit

Have you ever been a little nervous visiting a new doctor for the first time? Or have you experienced the butterflies associated with meeting a new therapist? It can be pretty nerve wrecking to meet a stranger. Even more so when you could be talking about very personal things with them. Having an open conversation where no question or concern is too small, can make all the difference in how your kiddo approaches their therapeutic journey. You won’t regret it. 

Example:

“We’re going to see [insert therapist name]. They help kids [feel better about things bothering them/with their feelings/who has lost someone close to them/etc]. You can talk to them about anything. You’ll be doing some talking [and playing if it applies] with them.”

“I know you’ve been feeling pretty down lately. We’re going to meet with [Insert therapist name]. Her job is to help kids cope better with tough times.”

2. Break the Stigma

Talking to your child about therapy is a great way to break the stigma around therapy but also foster healthy communication. Your child isn’t going to therapy because they are “bad” or something is “wrong”. Letting your child know this is important as therapy stigmas still exist, even among our younger ones. 

Asking how your child feels about starting therapy is a great starting point. Talking about the various reasons people go to therapy is also an excellent way to normalize therapy and show how common it is. 

Example:

“People go to therapy for a lot of reasons. Sometimes a therapist can help when someone is really sad or really mad. Sometimes they can help a person feel better after they have lost someone. Therapy is a way for people to talk about things and try to feel better.”

3. Support Trust 

Talking to the therapist about concerns regarding your child, while your child is present can be a bit awkward. Therapy is a partnership between the child, family, and therapist. We work as a team and as a team, we work towards trust. Discussing intimate or unfavorable information about your child before they enter the session can potentially make the child avoidant of therapy or not want to open up. 

Also, using phrases such as “Wait until I tell your therapist” or “We need to get you a session” in response to undesirable behavior changes how children view therapy. 

The fear of different treatment from the therapist based on behaviors outside of the session can impact the trusting relationship between therapist and child. 

If you have concerns about your child’s behavior or want to give an update, I recommend contacting the therapist directly (before the session). 

4. Respect Privacy and Autonomy

I know you want your child to feel better. Why else would you be here?! In the urge to support the therapeutic journey parents may try to encourage the child to engage. Some common missteps in encouragement are to tell your kid “Do what your therapist tells you.” or “Tell them about [insert personal situation]”. Your child’s therapeutic journey is at their own pace. Attempting to get your child to disclose personal information too soon can be very uncomfortable. Trust that when they are ready, they will talk about it.  

5. Give Some Room 

Phrases such as  “So what did you talk about in therapy?”, “Did you behave?”, or “Did you have a good session?” Can be a bit super awkward for a kid. What if  they were just talking about the they got punishment hat was so unfair?! Or your child doesn’t want to upset you. Whatever the reason, it’s good practice to check in with the therapist directly if you want update on progress. Give your child a little room to process their therapeutic journey. 

There may be times when your child is excited about progress or new activities in therapy and want to share. I encourage you to be open and available to hear the details they have to share. Meeting your child with excitement and interest in their therapy shows support beyond measure. If your child has chosen to give you a glimpse into their private world, know this is intentional.

BONUS

6. Give Yourself Some Praise

Take time to recognize the investment you’ve made with your child. Understanding the importance of wellness and showing your child how to care for themselves is a pretty big deal. It isn’t easy to say “I need some help with my little one”. You are appreciated.